Write It Down

Subtitle: “How I Earned an All Expense Paid Trip to the Dominican Republic”

There’s a well-known study in behavioral psychology about the 1953 graduating class of Yale University.  3% of that class, upon graduation, committed their goals down to paper.  20 years later, follow up on the alumni from this group found that those 3% had acquired more wealth than the other 97% graduates combined!  This study is frequently cited as a powerful testimony to the power of the written word.

Unfortunately, the study never happened.  Yup, just like many urban myths that proliferate through email forwards and websites, there’s not a parcel of truth to this study.

Or is there?

Both Yale and Harvard (who is sometimes listed as the graduating university in variations of the story) have both confirmed that this study never existed, despite the fact that consultants, coaches and business managers have been quoting it as a foundational principle for achievement and goal setting for years.  The persistence of this belief, to me, indicates that it is an idea that does still resonate with us, even despite the apparent lack of empirical data to support it.

I’ve always personally subscribed to the power of the written word, whether it’s using day to day logging (like food logging, or tracking exercise) or journaling for more long term goals and self-reflection.  Recently, I’ve been cleaning out a filing cabinet that contains at least four years worth of papers and documents.  In my paper shuffling, I came across some interesting pieces of evidence about the power of writing things down.

The first was a pretty heavy-duty piece of self-reflection that I had to complete as part of my coaching training, about 3 years ago.  The questionnaire was an exhaustive 20 pages, but of course, I couldn’t help but dive in to see what had changed in the time that had transpired.  One of the exercise involved evaluating how you spent your time vs. how you would like to spending your time, and as I read through exercise I saw that I had written that “I feel like I am living on adrenaline, constantly rushing from one thing on my to do list to the next and never feeling like I was actually present in the moment.  If the only thing that changed after coaching training was this feeling, it’d be worth every dollar I’m paying to be here.”

I re-read that statement three or four times before I realized that I had really written that, and felt that way.   I don’t feel like that at all anymore.  I can’t say that I consciously came up with a plan to put in to place to slow down my life, although I could probably attribute the change to regular gratitude journaling, somewhat regular meditation, and saying “no” more often.  I was amazed to see that while I had not consciously focused on creating that change, I had indeed created that change.  (Guess my coaching training WAS worth every dollar I paid for it.)

The next thing I found was a “wheel of wellness” that I had created a few years ago to use with clients.  It’s a wheel with various aspects of wellness (food choices, emotional eating, energy balance, etc) and the client rates their satisfaction on a scale of 1-10 in each wedge of the wheel.  It gives you a picture of how balanced their life is, and it also helps identify areas to start working on.  I had “tested it” on myself about 3 years, and had written on the back that the only area I was dissatisfied with was my food choices, in particular the amount of processed foods I used.  I had written that my primary goals would be to cut back on diet coke (which was an at least once a day addiction).   I shoved that paper into a drawer and never looked at it again.

But what happened?  A few months ago, my husband and I decided we would stop buying soda to keep in our house.  It’s still my ‘go to treat’ but now instead of having one every day for lunch, and sometimes again after work, I have 2-3 a week.  I didn’t consciously make that decision remembering the wheel, but nonetheless, my written down goal has come true, again without really a great deal of effort!

Okay, you want to know how I went on an all expensive paid trip to the Carribean don’t you?  The last piece a paper I found was entitled “BIG WIGS.”  WIG stands for “Wildly Improbable Goals,” and comes from Martha Beck’s book Finding Your Own North Star.  (A fantastic “soul-searching” book that I highly recommend.)  Beck’s premise is to write down goals that are SO wild, so improbable, so crazy that you can’t even imagine how they’d come true.  This gets you out of the “yeah, but….” self talk that tends to circle Somewhat Probable Goals (not very catchy, I know).  I won’t tell you what all my WIGs were (because the other ones are going to come true, I know now)… but I had written “All-expense paid trip to somewhere warm and tropical with my hubby.”

WELL.  I heard the Twilight Zone music start to play when I read this.  Last year, I was talking to a friend who told me about a program where Personal Trainers could go work a week at a number of different resorts in exchange for their and guest accommodations and food.  As I still had my personal training certification active, I signed us right up and last May, Matt and I lounged around in the Dominican Republic, all expenses paid, in exchange for 2 hours working as a personal trainer ever day.

Now, my WIG didn’t exactly mention I’d be working for 10 hours that week, but do yout hink I’m complaining?  NOPE!

The last piece of paper was what struck me the most, because at the time, when I wrote it, I couldn’t foresee any possible way that we’d be headed somewhere warm and tropical … and not pay a dime.  But that’s the magic… I couldn’t imagine it, so there was no doubt or anything to get in my way. There’s something powerful that happens when we write things down, and tuck them away.

Look, some goals need to be SMART goals.  They need specifics, they need plans, they need follow-up.  But some goals are either so big and too wild to tame (like my trip), or they’re a little fuzzy around the edges to create a how to plan (my “less adrenaline, please” goals.)  And some goals fall in the “would be nice” category – you’d like to make them happen, but maybe they lack a little bit of the urgency that creates an “okay, what’s next?!” kind of plan. These goals might not need the same kind of systemic, SMART style plan that clearly defined, specific, and time-oriented goals need.

Some goals need plans, and some goals need incubation.  The latter – the wild ones, the fuzzy ones and the non urgent ones, are the perfect types of goals to incubate.  To write down, to dream about, and then to put away to hatch.  I’m not promising that everything you write down on a piece of paper comes true, but I’m a firm believer that the actual act of committing your dreams or goals to paper is one of the very critical pieces in creation.  It’s an act of intention. Taking it out of the mind, putting it consciously on to paper.  Putting words to the dream.

Someone once said “a goal is just a wish until you write it down.”  It may not have been a Yale graduate who uttered those words, but it’s sage advice nonetheless.

You don’t have to know how to make a goal happen yet.  But writing it down is the first step towards committing your intention to making it happen.

I challenge you to write down 3 goals:

(1) one BIG WIG goal.  Fairly specific, but so wild you can’t even imagine how it would happen goal.

(2) a fuzzy goal – a feeling or experience or a state of being you’d like.  Again, you don’t have to know how it’ll happen.

(3) a non-urgent goal.  Something you’d like to do, but don’t feel stressed about.

Write it down in a journal.  Write in a piece of paper you fold up and tuck into the back of your filing cabinet.  Leave it in the comments.  Send it to me an email.  (If you do, I promise to email you in 2 years and see where you are!)

Just begin with the intentional act of committing your goals to the written word, and let the magic take hold.  Trust me, you’ve got nothing to lose and maybe a vacation to go on…. Endless pina coladas by the poolside?  Yes, please!

Pesto!

For Valentine’s Day, my husband gave me a plant.  It’s called a polka dot plant.  And it’s sitting on a pot behind my kitchen sink.  The fact that it’s actually alive, a whole five months after I have acquired it is a miracle in and of itself.  I’m not exactly known for my green thumb.

One of these days though, I’d like actually have a garden.  I’d like to experience putting seeds in the earth and getting my hands dirty and seeing the fruits (and veggies) of my labor sprout out months later.  In the meantime, though, I’ll have to be content with polka dot … and my friends sharing the excess production from their labors.

Last week we had a potluck party to celebrate a friend’s birthday and another friend leaving for Italy.  Our friends showed up with dinner dishes in hand, and a bonus – basil!  Three of my girlfriends – Jamie, Anne and Akanksha – all came with a Ziploc baggie full of basil.  I knew exactly what I had to do with all this fragrant delicious green stuff… make pesto!

This recipe comes from my Aunt Jennifer.  It’s incredibly simple, but so flavorful.  I make it in my food processor, but for years – during college and grad school – I would actually make it in a blender.  (Meaning if you don’t have a food processor, don’t despair… you can still make this!)

Here’s the recipe:
2 cup packed basil leaves
½ cup parmesan cheese
1/3 cup toasted pinenuts
2 cloves garlic
¼ cup olive oil
2 Tbsp red wine
2 Tbsp lemon juice
1 tsp salt

Throw in a blender or food processors.  Whirl.  Eat.

Uses for pesto:
-          My Aunt Jennifer always cooks tortellini and chicken and tosses it in pesto.
-          I toss on roasted beets + potatoes for a little flavor.
-          Make a Caprese salad (sliced tomatoes, mozzarella and basil) and drizzle a little pesto over.
-          Slice a French baguette into thin slices, drizzle a little bit of pesto on each piece and add chopped tomatoes on top.  Broil for instant bruschetta!

Pesto IS very calorically dense (cheese, olive oil, nuts….) – so remember, a little bit goes a long way.  But it’s a great way to use fresh basil from your garden, as well as heart healthy olive oil and nuts, and antioxidant-rich garlic.

Other variations include swapping the pine nuts for walnuts, and swapping basil for other fragrant herbs like parsley or sage.  (See my parsley pesto here.)

The Sis!

My sister came to visit me!

We made squash sandwiches.

And talked about weddings. (Hers, obviously.)

And snuggled with pupdog.

And met some of hubby’s co-workers out a bar – but only talked to each other and Jamie. (Oops.)

And talked about how much fun it will be when she moves to Winston-Salem permanently.

Just kidding.

But wouldn’t that be nice?

Another Saturday Night, And I Ain’t Got Nobody

Matt was working last night, so I downloaded the movie Valentine’s Day to watch while I folded laundry and cleaned. I thought that it would be a nice way to “treat” myself, considering my lame-o Saturday night plans. (Don’t take that as a complaint; what makes me a perfect match for an emergency medicine resident is that one weekend night out, one weekend night in is my idea of perfect balance.) Anyways… I digress. The movie? Have any of you seen it? Other than it having lots of my favorite actors in it, the plot/stories were really weak. Like a watered down Love Actually. The only part where I truly laughed out loud was at the end there’s an outtake of Julia Roberts in a car, and the driver says to her as they pass by, "Rodeo Dr? You ever shopped there?" and she goes "Once. Big Mistake. Big. Huge."

Oh Julia. You are a keeper. (Anyone else psyched about her playing Liz Gilbert in upcoming "Eat, Pray, Love" movie?)

Friday night, we attended end of the year party at our friend Anne and Locke’s house. End of the year for both teacher-Anne and the first year interns. To the rest of us suckers, summer doesn’t mean anything except relief from the heat in the office air conditioner. I brought my camera, but somewhere between mainlining artichoke dip and bringing back my old school flip cup skills, I forgot to bring it out. Jamie was walking around with hers, so I’ll just send you on over to her post. (Eventually, we’re just going to come up with a schedule as to who is in charge of documenting and blogging our mutual events.)

Once I had my house all spiffy and my laundry all folded, it was crafty time up in the Cline house. (Seriously, guys, I am just OUT OF CONTROL and wild.) I saw this post and decided to try my hand at it. So I spent the wee hours of Saturday night cutting up an old tee-shirt and glue-glunning. (Haven’t sewn to a shirt yet; will post pictures when it’s complete.) To say my husband was shocked when he called at the end of his shift (midnight) and I was still up is an understatement. It was a fortunate surprise though, as we had nothing as far as good eats in the house, so I put away my glue gun and whipped up some late-night quesadillas for the good doc. See what I mean? Best EM wife ever.

From flip cup Friday night to crafting with my snoring doggy Saturday night. That, my friends, is balance.

Oh, and footnote… speaking of crafts: I know I posted this on Facebook, but I don’t think I posted it here yet. This was my other project from our sewing night. Anne had brought this cute swirly orange and white fabric. I cut shapes out from it, and just free-handed them on with the sewing machine on to a T-shirt that had been in my goodwill pile. I was really happy with how it turned out. Pardon the dorky self-timer pics.

Morning Glory

Satisfy us in the morning with Your steadfast love, so that we may rejoice and be glad all our days. – Psalm 90:14

(5:30 am sky, no photoshop required.)

Jess + Charlie

Jess and I met each other in the spring of 2003 at Wake Forest, but it wasn’t until about a year later that we discovered how many shared interests we had, such as running (including a love affair for the exact same sneakers, Asisics Gel Nimbus), photography, wine and epidemiology/public health, leading us to dub one another our “matched case.”  For those of you who don’t share a passion for public health stats, a matched case is basically a set of people you can use to stand in for one another in research trials because of the number of shared similarities they have. 

After graduating Wake, we became closer than ever and shared with each other our challenges, dreams and funny moments of single girls going through grad school and trying to create our dream careers.  Along the way, we’ve both acquired a few degrees (me-2, Jess-seven? eight? twelve?), a few running blisters, and more than a few tales of less than perfect suitors. 

I think when Jess met Charles, we (the “winos”) had a hunch that this was it.  Jess’ happiness was evident, and her stories about their relationship made all of us excited that our best friend had met her matched case. 

In typical Jess fashion, I got a voicemail from her one day last spring.  “Hey Megs, it’s Jess.  I just wanted to let you know I’m engaged.  Gimme a call when you can.”

I squealed.  I shrieked.  I jumped up and down.  I could hear Jess’s smile through the phone, and pressed her to tell me every detail of the engagement.  I then I forced myself into her life even more by telling her I was showing up with my camera to document one of my absolute favorite couple’s love story.  Here are some pictures from their engagement photo shoot, taken in early May.

I think you’ll see for yourself why I love this couple so very much.  Their wedding is set for October 30th, 2010 and will take place at a vineyard outside the beautiful city they met and reside in, Charlottesville, VA. 

I love the sunlight in this last pic… and of course, those 2 very well loved doggies, Ivy and Ada.

 ~ Best wishes, Jess + Charlie!  10.30.10 ~

Drive Until the Map Turns Blue

Right now, I am sitting in an office with no windows, updating a credit card expense report and listening to what I am pretty sure is a dentist drill on steroids, although I am told it is a wet vac because there is a leak in our office roof and the room next door to me has a squishy carpet.  Eww.

On THAT note, I think I need to go look at pictures from last weekend on the lake.  It’s been my experience that being near or on water is pretty much an instant dose of happy.  I can be laying on the beach with the sun glinting off water nearby, sipping coffee on a porch overlooking a still lake, laying on the front of a boat shielding my eyes from the choppy spray or, my most recent happy discover, being tugged along with a rope and my feet hooked together behind said boat.  And I’m happy.  Judging from these pics, I think the universal vote on this situation would be: “Me too.” 

These are all from Memorial Day at Cherokee Lake (Tennessee), where our wonderful friends Zac and Jamie took us under the lake-living wings and adopted us for the weekend. 

Ok, maybe everyone doesn’t love the water quite like we do…. Gus looks like he could do without lake time.

For now, I’ll put some Jimmy Buffett on my playlist, pretend the wet vac is the sound of the boat motor, and put on my sunglasses to protect me from the glow of the UV lights.  Until next time, Lake.

What about you?  Do you have a favorite beach, lake, pond, blow up baby pool in the backyard that blisses you out just to be nearby?

All you really need this time of year
Is a pair of shades and an ice cold beer
And a place to sit somewhere near
The water…
- Brad Paisley, Water

The OMG Salad

I saw a picture of this salad on my friend Jenn’s Twitter stream the other day and thought “OMG.  I have to make that.”  Usually when I bookmark recipes, it’s a few weeks (months… years…) sometimes before I remember to get back to them.  Not this one.  I saw the picture Monday and made the salad Tuesday.  And ate again for lunch on Wednesday.  It is that good.  I like to give credit where it’s due, and from what I can tell, this is where the recipe originated.

I have since renamed it the OMG salad, because that was what I said immediately upon tasting it.  I know it’s just a salad but well… did I mention there was chocolate involved?  Ok, just go ahead and take a peek.  The recipe follows below, straight from Mindy’s blog.

Vinaigrette

• 1 can (15oz) of Mandarin oranges (drained while saving 1/3 cup juice)
• 1/3 cup Champagne Vinegar
• 1/3 cup white chocolate chips
• ¼ teaspoon salt
• 4 tablespoons olive oil

Salad

• Spring Greens
• 2 ½ cups strawberries- sliced
• ½ cup mandarin oranges
• ½ pint blueberries &/or blackberries
• ¼ red onion sliced thin
• ½ cup blue or goat or feta cheese (optional)
• ½ cup slivered almonds or pecans toasted on the stove**

Mise en Place.

How To:

1. Drain oranges and keep 1/3 cup of juice.
2. In a small saucepan over medium heat, combine Mandarin orange juice, vinegar, salt and sugar. Heat until sugar is dissolved.
3. Remove from heat and add white chocolate pieces stirring frequently…once melted whisk in olive oil.
4. Pour over salad.

**Don’t skip this step.  Roasting the almonds brings out a really unique flavor to them, and this can be your protein on the salad. 

Please note: The dressing will harden/separate as it cools. Don’t be afraid of this. Just remember to sit it out in the sun or pop it in the microwave for a few seconds and whisk/shake before serving.  I found this made enough dressing for me to have 4 salads, at 200 calories a serving.  Granted that’s high for a dressing, but there’s chocolate in it… so you sorta saw that coming right?  But this salad was so filling, it’s all I had for my meal (add another 200 for salad/fruit/2 T nuts/2T cheese) and it was enough.

Ok, stop reading this and go make your salad now.

Summer Pasta Salad

One of my favorite things about cooking in the summertime is that a meals that are simple and light are what naturally appeals to me, anyways.  This is a dish I threw together to basically use up some ingredients in my pantry and fridge and it ended up being SO yummy. 

What you’ll need: whole wheat pasta, asparagus, shrimp, garlic a crumbly cheese like feta or goat, white wine and olive oil.  You could probably sub in chicken for the shrimp if you don’t like seafood or can’t eat it.  Optional: green onion.

Cook the pasta per directions, using 2 oz per person.  (If you don’t have a small scale you can keep on the counter, I highly recommend getting one like this!  You can buy a fancier one if you want to, but you don’t need to.)  Make sure it’s whole wheat pasta – the sugar rush you get from white pasta just isn’t worth it.  I made enough for four servings in the instructions/photos below.

While the pasta is boiling, cook the asparagus in a little bit of olive oil and minced garlic – you want them to still be crunchy, so aim for al dente.  Once they’re almost done (5 minutes?), add the shrimp and any other extras – I added green onions just because I had them on hand.

Once the shrimp turns pink, it’s time to get sauce-y.  Scoop the shrimp + asparagus mixture out of the pan, and set aside.  Turn the heat down to a low simmer and add 1/2 cup of a dry white wine to the pan, scraping the pan as you go.  Let this simmer for just a few minutes to thicken.

Remember, always cook with a wine that you’d drink!  No pouring the cheapo bad stuff in – you’ll taste the difference.  (If you’re planning on having a wine with dinner, even better if you cook with that wine – perfect compliment.)  **If you don’t want to cook with wine, you should read another blog… you could try chicken stock or a little bit of apple juice spiked with lemon juice to cut the sweetness.  Although, I have honestly no idea what that will taste like… let me know if you try it!

I used Chateau St. Jean Fume Blanc from my Sonoma County trip… a favorite!

Once the sauce has simmered, toss together with cooked veggies + shrimp, then sprinkle on cheese.

This meal pretty much begs to be eaten outside a pretty spring (or summer) evening.  And that is exactly what I did!  Also, you can eat this hot or cold.  I actually liked it better the next day when I had it for lunch and ate it cold.  The sauce settles in a little more, and it’s yummy and refreshing!

****

Oh you want the stats, eh?  Well, here they are to the best of my knowledge.  I’ve tried to reconstruct how much I used of each item, and entered that into the calorie counter here. 
For four servings: 400 calories per serving, 11g fat, 5g fiber, 455mg sodium, 23g protein.
8 oz whole wheat pasta
8 oz shrimp
1 T olive oil
1/2 bunch asparagus (or as much as you’d like)
1 minced garlic clove
1/2 cup white wine
4 oz feta

Technorati Tags: cooking, healthy cooking, dinner, shrimp

One Small Step

One small step.

That’s all it seemed like I was doing – one small step after another.  I’m not sure what I was doing could be considered running, but somehow I was still moving.  Rather than look at the far away crest of the hill, I looked down at my feet.  One small step.  Another small step.  “Am I shuffling or running?” I thought to myself.  I continued on in this manner, one small step at a time.

You know where this is going, right?  I made it to the top of the hill.  This wouldn’t be a very motivating post if I didn’t, would it? 

I didn’t use to be a “runner,” even though it seemed my entire family was born with sneakers laced up.  My Dad has been doing races for as long as I can remember.  My sister joined him and did her first 5k at 7 years old.  My brother ran cross-country in high school.  Growing up, the only running I ever did was when I got in trouble for running my mouth at cheerleading practice and was sent to jog the quarter mile track, huffing and puffing and praying no one on the football team could tell it was me.

When I graduated from high school, I decided I better find something to replace the cheerleading and dance to ward off the infamous freshmen fifteen I had been warned of.  So, I decided I wanted to be a runner.  I called my friend, Mariel and asked her “how do you run?”  After catching her breath through her laughter, she gave me a few helpful tips and wished me good luck.

I can remember the first day I went for a run.  It was a warm May day in upstate New York.  (Fortunately, humidity wassn’t something I’d have to contend with until a few months later, when I relocated to North Carolina.)  I had my brand new running clothes on, and a fresh pair of running sneakers.  I headed out the door, head held high, sneakers pounding the pavement proudly…. and made it to the end of the street before I was bent over, side stitch impaling me, run finished.

For curiosity sake, I just looked up what the distance was from the front door of my house to the end of my street.  0.3 miles.  This means I was probably moving for about 3-and-a-half or four minutes.  Well… you gotta start somewhere right?

Many, many small steps later, running has become a regular part of my life.  I’ve run 26.2 miles once, 13.1 miles twice and 3.2 miles more times than I can count.  I’ve run to shake writer’s block, I’ve run to stay awake after (a few) all nighters, I’ve run to push away a heartache, I’ve run to prove to someone that I can. I’ve run to train, I’ve run to burn calories, I’ve run to lose weight.  But mostly, these days, I run just to run.  It still sort of amuses me that those who’ve met me in the last decade consider me a runner, because so often in my head, I’m still that girl in the brand new sneakers gasping for breath at the stop sign of Guilford and Cranston. 

There are many, many small steps between that girl standing at a street corner, embarassed and defeated, and the girl who trudged up a hill today, in North Carolina humidity.  I still rarely find that running is “easy”, but today, I know I can do it.  As miserable as that hill was today, I knew I’d make it.  It might be ugly, it might be slow, and it might not even be a motion that would constitute was “running” but, one small step at a time, I knew I would finish it. 

The one step at a time is the only way I know to approach a goal that feels monumental.  To me, running 3 miles was monumental.  And then running 6 was, and then running 13 was.  Today, when I train for a half marathon, I start at the bare minimum of my comfort zone and push about 10% more than.  Each time, a few more small steps than what I know I can do.  This year, after a long winter hiatus, I started with a mile.  I’ll be honest, it’s going to take a long time to get to 13.  But I know I will get there – one small step at a time.

What marathon are you putting off training for?  Is it the overwhelming clutter that’s taking over your house, keeping you from being able to relax and find peace in your home?  Is it the monumental number on the scale that you’d have to peel off to be at a healthy weight?  Is it going back to school or beginning the process of a major career change?  Is it getting your finances organized or paying down massive credit? 

Most of us have hills that look incredibly intimidating when we’re standing at the bottom.  We can imagine how glorious it would feel to be coasting down the other side, but the actual journey of getting to the top?  We can only think about how hard it will be, how uncomfortable, maybe even painful it will be, and how long it will take.  Or maybe you’re like me, and part of what’s holding you back is the image you have of yourself – or, as I like to say, the story you’re telling yourself.  If I clung desperately to the idea that I really was that girl who couldn’t get past that first stop sign, I’d still be there.  Don’t get me wrong – I haven’t somehow morphed into Paula Radcliffe in the last ten years – but I’m moving.  One small step at a time. 

What’s your marathon?  Do you have a story about yourself that’s holding you back?  Is the pain of trudging up the hill really worse than standing at the bottom of it, looking up?  If you’re holding back because your goal is going to take a long time, think of it this way: a year is going to pass, one way or another.  Five years are going to pass.  Ten years are going to pass.  They can either pass with you still standing at the stop sign, gasping for breath, or you can be moving with them.  Maybe shuffling along sometimes, but moving still – one small step at a time. 
Technorati Tags: motivation, weight loss, goals